I am not planning a wedding.
I am not buying a wedding dress.
I am not thinking of cute little ideas of how to personalise the reception.
I am not pregnant.
I am not having sex and thus cannot fall pregnant.
I have no further comment on babies.
This isn’t me being a Grinch. Good on all of the people out there who are ready to settle down and take on this great responsibility and enjoy the decisions of their life.
I am not doing what they’re doing.
It is frustrating and sooooo annoying and rather condescending of social media to be monitoring what everyone around me does and think that I must be exactly the same as them. Facebook already thinks it knows where I came from based on my friends, but it can’t be sure until I have filled in the rest of the form. Thing is, I don’t want social media to know my home town, that’s why the GPS tracker in my phone has been switched off so apps don’t automatically find where I am. Stop using algorithms to stalk me.
And stop advertising things I have no interest in, just because my friends have babies.
In fact, stop advertising to me completely.
I don’t want to see Coon cheese on my news feed just because they’ve paid to advertise with you. I want to see my cheese in the super market where I can decide, based upon my taste preference (Bega is tastier) what cheese product to buy. I like cheese, yes. I don’t need to be reminded to buy cheese. I don’t need pointless ads shoved into my face.
Instead, show me things that are interesting to me. Show me new ideas. Show me different lifestyles.
Different lifestyles could mean marriage and babies. Forget it. Just show me books, cats, and anime. You did so well, Facebook, finding these pages for me and placing them in my line of sight. What happened? Why don’t you show me more anime and cats and books? Why do you torture me with weddings and babies?
If someone knows how to switch off the advertising bullshit, please share your knowledge. This is getting ridiculous. I cannot take another blushing bride and smiling baby. It is all lies! Babies are evil demons who scream and cannot tell you what they need. Weddings are a one off party, and marriage is hard. False advertising.