Last month I was reading an article from the latest edition of Womankind magazine (no longer do I read glossy pages of fashion envy, sex tips, and women's' guilt) about change. We all want to some days run away and leave the shit behind and be better people; wear different clothes, eat healthy foods, be sophisticated and go to gallery openings... in general, we want the dream life. However, in this article it suggests that life wouldn't be better if we just change locations.
What needs to change are our habits.
If you run away but take your everyday habits with you, then you will wear the same jeans, eat pizza instead of a salad (which who the hell really wants to eat salads?), stay in and watch movies instead of going to fancy events, and be attracted to the same sort of people you were running away from. It would be the repeat of your old life again. So instead of packing bags and impulsively running away when the shit hits the fan, it is suggested that you first change your habits and slowly become the person you feel you want to be.
I for one can say that changing habits is hard. It isn't just finding the motivation, you need to change the very way your brain operates. For a long time I thought running was a waste of time and anyone who did it was avoiding doing something productive around the house or at work. Then (because I want to get into the army, silly me) I started to give it ago. It took months for me not to think "this is pointless" and instead appreciate the change in health, the ability to maintain stamina when work (as a concreter) is scarce, and the runners high I really enjoyed at the end.
But it isn't just a thing about exercising more and wearing dresses. You really need to change how you think. Don't be so critical of yourself, in fact forget what you look like and that other people can see you and just have fun. Once you don't care, you can do the things that make you happy and really enjoy them.
Of course, once you have made the changes to habits there is the chance you will still feel stifled in your current location. Then it is time to move physically. I think I might be at that moment in my life ; things have changed and I still want to stretch my legs and walk around the world. Maybe this February I will buy a ticket and fly away. Maybe.