I hope your penis shrivels up into a black husk and drops off. Asshole.
In fact all men are asshats! They never have to sit through the awkward conversation I just had with my mother, nor have they faced the inevitable visit to the doctor *shiver*.
Mum: "I'm due for a pap smear at the start of next year, which means you would've been sexually active for twelve months. Do you want to have yours at the same time with Sister or would you like to book in with Doctor at a different time?"
Once. I've only had sex once and this is what I have to go through? This is bullshit!
One painful sexual act and from now on I have to have regular pap smears to make sure the virus that males carry but are not affected by does not cause changes in my cervix and tries to kill me.
Do you want the truth? That time with Rodger sucked, along with all the times we fooled around. Mostly because he had no clue what he was doing and he wouldn't take any direction. "That is not my sweet spot, try over here and do this... nope, I mean this... still not doing it like I asked... move out of the way I'll do it myself."
If there had been pleasure then I wouldn't be bitter. Then there would be some incentive to be sexually active and put up with the awkward conversations and other things. Instead I'm not sure I can go through that again and still be disappointed. Is there any guy out there who knows where the clitoris is and what to do to it? Seriously! It isn't rocket science.
So I'm going to book in a doctors appointment and do as she asks, after all early detection could save my life.